SPRING IS IN THE AIR – Time for Accelerated Personal Growth!
Yes, spring is almost upon us, and its once again time to shake out the dust and toss out all the junk to make room for new personal growth ! As I’ve said many times, there are only two possible approaches to the inevitable and inherent process of continual personal growth. One option (and this is my personal recommendation), is the proactive approach. By being actively engaged in your own growth process you accelerate this process, you derive a sense of inner peace and stability which comes from being more in control of your life. And you also actively develop your self-worth, possibly the most valuable benefit I’ve mentioned.
The alternative is to resign ourselves to passivity. This can take on various forms ranging from a care-free abandon to full-blown victim mentality, although these are usually two sides of the same coin, experienced in alternate succession due to a lack of responsibility. What it ultimately boils down to is resistance. If we are resistant to change we are likely to interpret our experiences as stressful, painful or even traumatic and we will most certainly retard our personal growth.
Although these two approaches may take various form, there is no grey area. One of my favorite personal sayings is that “if you take life seriously it becomes an enjoyable game, but if you treat life as a game it very quickly becomes serious!” So lets get right to it!
RECOMMENDATIONS to Accelerate Your Personal Growth
So what can you do to be as proactive as possible?
- Make peace with your true nature as a human being
- Gain CLARITY through a thorough understanding of your underlying drives and motivations
- Gain a thorough understanding of the universal laws and principles that govern our lives
- Weed out ideas and beliefs that no longer serve you (this will begin to occur naturally once you engage in the previous steps)
- Choose perspectives that derive the most productivity from your experiences
- Take FULL responsibility for your choices, behavior, circumstances and situations (this is a natural progression from the previous points)
Often, some of our proactive effort towards personal growth and develop is wasted because we are subconsciously sabotaging or impeding our own progress in certain ways. So how do we overcome these self-imposed obstacles? SPRING CLEANING of course! The following exercise will assist you to identify some of the issues that are obstructing your growth, and your enjoyment of life. Completing it correctly will produce results relating to each of the points listed above.
EXERCISE: PART 1 (Self-Discovery)
- Make a list of the traits and qualities you most dislike or despise in others. For example – cruelty, hurtfulness, negativity, uncaring, neediness, self-serving, liar, unfaithful, etc. Make sure you are 100% honest with yourself, choosing the traits and qualities that YOU most often REACT TO, avoid impersonal concepts like global inequality or you will not get the full benefit from this exercise.
- Now re-order the list from the top down starting with those qualities you believe least describe YOU.
One of the least understood concepts regarding our nature as human beings is the principle of unity / wholeness. On the one hand we like the idea that we are all connected, that each of us is inherently whole and complete, and that everything we experience has meaning or a higher purpose. On the other hand we condemn, deny and disown parts of our true nature as human beings causing inner conflict, we condemn others for their behavior towards us because we fail to recognize the role they are playing in our development process and the value of the opportunities they present, and we condemn and fail to appreciate certain experiences because we don’t see them as a meaningful part of our lives.
We all have the full spectrum of human traits and qualities, and we express them according to our underlying interests, drives and motivations, based on our hierarchy of motivational values (discover more about motivational values here on our blog). This judgment is driven by our level of empowerment in the various areas of life. We tend to be self-righteous and minimize others relative to our areas of greatest empowerment, and we tend to minimize ourselves and aggrandize others relative to our areas of least empowerment. In the areas of life in which we are dis-empowered, we are always overpowered by some person, organization or institution, its a natural law meant to motivate us to empower ourselves. If we fail to take full responsibility for our dis-empowerment, feeling victimized, threatened or pressurized our “negative” traits are express outside of our control. If we have made peace with these traits in us and understand them as serving us in certain situations, we tend not to judge them as “negative”. Conversely, we tend to naturally overpower others in the areas of life in which we are empowered and they are dis-empowered. In this way we motivate others to empower themselves. If we judge this as “negative” we are failing to recognize the valuable service we are offering others in such circumstances. The stark reality is that the universe isn’t about NICE, its about FUNCTIONALITY. If we are avoiding fulfilling certain roles in an attempt to be “nice” we are likely also often wondering why we’re not getting where we want to be in life.
EXERCISE: PART 2 (Integration)
So now its time to complete the Exercise by owning the traits in ourselves which we project and externalize because we believe them to be negative, producing resentment and conflict in us. (Start with the trait you most despise, and feel least describes you).
Here is a list of the 7 basic areas of life, in no particular order of priority, as a reference: Spirituality & Evolution, Knowledge & Wisdom, Health & Well-being, Family & Relationships, Connection & Influence, Wealth & Finances, Vocation & Business.
Complete the set of questions below for each of the traits on your list.
- In what area of your life do you experience this trait being expressed towards you by others? ( Identify which of you is empowered and which is dis-empowered? ).
- How does this trait in them serve you? (at least 10 ways it serves you)
- How does this trait in them serve them? (at least 10 ways it serves them)
- In which area of your life do you express this trait? Towards whom? ( Identify which of you is empowered and which is dis-empowered? ).
- How does this trait in you serve you? (at least 10 ways it serves you)
- How does this trait in you serve others? (at least 10 ways it serves them)
Note: It is likely that you will find it difficult to answer some of the questions above. The idea is to sit with it and don’t give up too easily. The mind can take some prodding to look at things from a new perspective, especially one so diametrically opposed to the perspective we have been taught. This is BIG picture perspective, designed to loosen our attachment to people, things and experiences, and get the ego into correct perspective.
You can find more detailed personal growth info on our website here
We hope you have found value in this month’s exercise. Its powerful stuff if you’re willing to work your way through it. The more examples you can find for each of the questions the more powerfully you will open yourself to new perspectives and opportunities. We would like your feedback so we know we’re making a difference! email us here: email@example.com
You can visit our website here to find out more about what we do and how we can best serve you. (No, not by overpowering you! haha, but I’m glad you were taking note!)
Here is a link if you are interested in attending : A Celebration of Women Summit
We were recently interviewed for the Liquid Lunch TV show. We shared the story of how we met and got married, which is almost beyond belief! We also discuss a range of other topics relating to personal growth : Consciousness, awareness, reality, the mechanics of growth, dynamics of relationships, etc.
The videos are up on YouTube so go take a look: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.
Feel free to comment and share.
Have a fantastic month ,
Here’s to your Accelerated Personal Evolution!
Graham & Monika Burwise